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Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota, United States

Diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes in April of 1980. I recognize the incredible mental struggle of living with diabetes. I hope to share my struggles, my successes, and everything in between.

Monday, January 30, 2006

It's that time already?

So I just noticed that my quarterly endo appointment is coming up again.

Damn. It feels like just yesterday when I went in there and was thrown into a tailspin with a higher than expected A1C. I've been trying to get my head on straight ever since. And now I realize that it's been almost three months - that's one quarter of a year.

I know I've been fighting. Up and down, feeling good then bad, frustrated then encouraged, crumbling under pressures then rising to challenges. But I'm shocked to realize that I've spent the whole three months fighting with myself.

Have I learned anything through this process? Yes, I think I have. Most of it due to very caring, thought provoking and encouraging comments to my posts. I can't thank you all enough for taking the time to do that. It does make a difference and it does help a great deal.

Though still I have not won the fight. I feel that I am digging my way out, but it's nipping at my heels. I want to be done with it! I want to be at a place where I'm Ok with how I'm doing, and comfortable with those efforts.

I know, just based on my recent struggles, that this next endo visit will be hard to swallow. I'm really not even sure I want to know what my A1C is (although I can't resist the temptation to have yet another number to beat myself up with). It will probably be lower because I'm expecting it to be higher.

Trust that you will all have an entertaining account of how that appointment goes. It's a couple weeks away yet, but it will be here before you know it.


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